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Putting the R.A.P. in Rapport – Mastering the Art of High Power Communication

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- Dr. Karen Jacobson, high performance coach, author, speaker and wellness advisor.

hoshi-sato-star-trek-enterpriseImagine walking into a room anywhere around the world, listening to any foreign language and immediately being able to communicate and speak with everyone around you.

How cool would that be?

I’ve always had a secret fantasy of being able to do that.. I have been a big fan of Star Trek. One of my favorite characters was Lieutenant Commander Hoshi Sato, she was the human linguist could instantly connect with anyone I wanted to be it just like her.

Now, perhaps speaking Klingon or Vulcan isn’t really essential in the business world or for that matter on planet Earth; yet the gift of being able to communicate effectively with anyone, at any time, in any given situation is invaluable.

Whether you have a product or a service, you are in sales. How many of you cringe at the thought of being a salesperson? Your mind fills with images of pushy salespeople and you want to just run away.

One of the biggest mistakes that people make in offering their products and services is working hard to sell a something where there is no need or no perceived value.

Whether it’s sales or a budding romance, proper communication is essential and can make all the difference between closing the deal or walking away empty handed.

What if you can look at your exchange process in a completely different fashion? What if you were connecting to people and offering them solutions to their pain, suffering and problems?

Delivering your message it is more than just what you say. It is how you say what you say, when you say it and why you say what you say.. Sounds a little confusing? Songwriter John Mayer said it best: “say what you need to say”…

Whether in a one-on-one situation, on stage or in writing, high power communication is an essential key in High Performance Living. It is a topic that I review with my clients both in sales and in relationships. Raising the level of your communication, will deepen your connection with people and enhance your relationships.

Get more inside information on the R. A. P. of Rapport in Dr. Jacobson’s free live webinar on July 17, 2014. Click here to register!

Let’s simplify things. Let’s look at the strategy of Putting the R.A.P. in Rapport.

R- Relate to your audience

Business TalksAside from choosing the proper target market, it is essential to make a connection with them. People want to feel valued and appreciated. Who do you do business with? People you like and care about. If you want people to do business with you, it would probably help if they felt that you cared about them, wouldn’t it? Show them you care, get to know them a bit, build rapport

Body language has been considered to make up 55% of communication; your voice makes up 38% and words 7%.

Your physiology and body language can help you make a connection. Keep your body open and your posture nonthreatening, give the other person proper personal space. Help them feel at ease through process of mirroring and matching. Remember like attracts like and connects to like.

Pay attention to your voice. Are your tone, volume and pitch similar to your customer or audience? How about your energy? Are you excited about making a new connection and the possibility of helping someone without overpowering them?

Are you speaking their language? Are you using terms that they can understand? One of the biggest mistakes is getting too technical by using professional jargon with someone who really doesn’t care. If you ask someone to help you download a movie you want to watch, you want them to explain to you how the Internet works?

A- Active listening

What is behind the words? Are you truly listening to your audience? What are they asking for? Are they hesitant, do they have reservations? Remember, people will buy what they value and what they want, not necessarily what they need. They look for a solution to the problem, a relief for their pain or suffering. Are you hearing them and speaking their language?

Our five senses provide us with opportunities to experience different modes of communication. While we all possess all modes of learning and communication, there is usually one that is more dominant for us. People will fall into the categories of visual, auditory and kinesthetic. In other words, those of us, which are more comfortable with seeing things, those that need to hear things and those that are feelers. Our primary mode of communication is the language in which we process information and connects to others.
Understanding your customers’ primary mode of communication will help you better relate to them. You can figure out their communication mode by listening to their language and the words they used to describe things or by watching their eye movement patterns.
Once you successfully related to your customer or your audience, established a good rapport and actively listened to their problem, understood their language and the way they communicate; you can move to the third and final step by offering and presenting your solution.

P- Present your solution

it’s time to fill the need. When you present the solution you are making a simple offer, the need and the value have already been established by understanding the problem. It’s an easy process, just like giving a fresh towel to someone who’s soaking wet. All they need to dry off. You wouldn’t want to sell them Cologne, would you?

Speak their language, use their words. Make them feel comfortable. Be authentic and let them truly know that you are here for them.

People want solutions. They want to know what is in it for them. They want to know that things will work and the problems will be resolved; push a sale on them and they will walk the other way. By using high power communication, you can connect with them, listen and identify their problem and offer them a solution that will change their life. When you do that you will build trust and a great following, create loyal customers that will come back for more!

 

 

Dr. Karen Jacobson invested years studying leadership, human behavior, communication and Law of Attraction. In addition to having a private chiropractic practice for over 22 years, she received certifications in Coaching, NLP-Neuro Linguistic Programming, TimeLine Therapy™ and Hypnotherapy. In her high performance coaching practice she focuses on the Mind-body Connection and its effects on health and Human Potential. She follows the philosophy that the circumstances in our life are dictated by our own personal blueprint: our perception of the world, mindset, emotions and beliefs. Dr. Jacobson blends Intuition with Science and offers you the Keys to Unlock Your Ultimate Potential and Live an Extraordinary Life!

 

photo credit: dhammza via photopin cc

Posted in Business & Personal Skills | Leave a comment

 

Social Media Build Your Tribe – Entice Engagement By Giving Your Followers Success

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Social Media engagement starts a cocktail-party style encounter amidst streams of clever quotes and cute critters.

Twitter - the local Social Marketing ToolYou have a chance to say ‘hi’ with a smile, you may have a chance to chat, and sometimes there’s a click-through. Engaging followers on social involves learning the techniques of a specific type of charm.

When you meet people in person you have visual clues for engagement success. Everyone likes to hear that they look good, though it’s wise to avoid a loaded word like ‘beautiful’ because there are so many ways it can make someone uncomfortable.

Instead, use a less threatening comment like “that’s a great color.” Women are often susceptible to shoes, so wearing great shoes and commenting on great shoes both provide opportunities for interaction. Many people can respond comfortably if you ask how they came to be at your location – unless you’re sharing a police lineup.

Most loaded words and awkward situations in posts can be avoided with mindfulness. Intelligent writers may forget that followers could be intimidated by language or ideas. Does that mean you should dumb down your posts? Would changing your language to be more accessible to readers be dumbing down, or would it be giving your followers an opportunity to engage?

People like to feel successful.

Every time you give them an opportunity to succeed you are giving them a chance to feel good about engaging with you. As well as sharing quality information, invite your followers to engage with topics that they’ll find easy.

popsicleSometimes it’s surprising what people find welcoming – I got a high response to a post that asked people their favorite flavor of Popsicle.

It can be just as surprising to discover what people may find uncomfortable. Often people will react to a trigger and withdraw, skipping past your post without even realizing they didn’t read it.

Subconscious programs that affect relationships have all sorts of hidden triggers. People may withdraw if they feel evaluated, judged, or if they feel there are unmeetable requirements.

How could a post contain unmeetable requirements?

Here’s a quick check to determine if you could inadvertently have an unmeetable requirement in a post: have you ever asked someone to do something that they did not complete the way you wanted it done?

Like most people, you’ve probably found yourself explaining something you thought was obvious (how could anyone think the kitchen was clean if the dishwasher wasn’t loaded) or found yourself describing how to do something that you learned by yourself (it’s not rocket science, you figured it out) or frustrated that a person didn’t understand a deadline (when the meeting is Wednesday, that means the slides have to be ready for Wednesday, why would you have to say that?)

Sometimes a person is confused because they don’t have all the information and context that’s in your head. Sometimes they’re confused because they have different values or ideas that cause them to draw different conclusions from the same information. Sometimes they don’t care about what you care about, and they aren’t going to give it the same attention, interest, or effort.

When you send a post into the stream you’re going to interact with all sorts of different perceptions. Fortunately, there are ways to improve your ability to give your followers a positive experience. It’s easy when you know how, and becomes part of your usual mindful awareness.

Does a post even have requirements?

Here are a few examples of requirements routinely included in posts:

Call to action
If your follower doesn’t feel ready to act you can avoid triggering withdrawal by offering more information and an opportunity, instead of a ‘buy now.’ Would you rather entice them towards a purchase or trigger withdrawal with an unmeetable requirement?

Links, videos and images
Double up your posts to ensure your followers can succeed. What if they’ve got a terrible data plan and avoid images? Maybe they use an app on their tablet that makes follow-through challenging. Share your post both with and without images to give your followers opportunities to engage.

New information
Wait a minute, aren’t you supposed to offer quality information? Absolutely, and the best way to allow your followers to absorb new information is with pacing. New information is introducing something they don’t know, so it’s hard for them to feel successful. It could even contradict what they currently believe, which could feel as if you’ve called them wrong!

In order to avoid these triggers, use what they already know as a nonthreatening introduction before introducing the new information. With pacing you get to agree with them and give them something – two feel goods in one.

Build Your Tribe: When you allow your followers to succeed, you become a source of positive feelings

When you’re inviting followers into a tribe it’s important to provide clear requirements so they can feel they belong in your tribe.

If you’re looking for followers on a page called ‘Everybody who turned fifty in 2014’ then you’re made it crystal clear who belongs. Maybe you want all the followers you can get, so you don’t want to specify requirements. How would people know if they can belong to your tribe if they don’t know how to succeed? There’s a reason American presidents start speeches with “My fellow Americans.”

Unmeetable requirements trigger withdrawal. Meetable requirements give people a chance to feel successful.

What is a meetable requirement?

Meetable requirements:

  • are measurable
  • have objective requirements definitions
  • have an objectively defined finish line

A measurable requirement can be evaluated by both parties, and by an objective third party.

‘Do better’ is not a meetable requirement.

‘Finish the report before five pm today’ is a meetable requirement if the person has what they need to complete the report on time.

Check your posts to ensure any requirements, including language and tone, allow your follower to know if they are succeeding.

A requirement has an objective definition when a stranger can understand your meaning. Could a stranger understand ‘paint this red?’ It could be expensive to discover what red means to a stranger – or to someone you’ve worked with for four years.

I have to admit, sometimes the only way to spot the assumptions in a post is to ask someone else to read it! Another option is to train yourself to spot your assumptions by having a teenager, as they’re brilliant at demonstrating assumptions.

A finish line is a critical element for success. Have you ever had that feeling that your work is never ending? Never ending is definitely not a successful feeling! You and your followers will feel a lot better with finish lines that allow success and validation of your accomplishments.

Try it out: when you get to the end of this post, notice that you’ve achieved a task and learned something new and give yourself a pat on the back.

Give your followers a task they can finish by inviting them to comment, and a way to succeed by asking them what they know : I know I’ve had a good day because I’ve had an opportunity to provide these tips for Enticing Engagement. How could you know you’ve had a good day?

‘You never talk to me’ or ‘you don’t give me the information I need’ are unmeetable requirements for an employee, partner, parent or offspring.

When you’re rephrasing a requirement to allow your relationship to succeed, you’re avoiding sabotaging your own relationship. If you’re interested in a good relationship, it’s not just worth the effort – it’s essential.

Some people love a face to face discussion. Other people need an activity, and side by side interaction. Go for a walk instead of sitting in a meeting room, do a task which the other person feels competent doing together, go for a drive – all of these create an atmosphere that encourages comfortable conversation. Start a conversation with a topic that is comfortable for the other person to allow the flow to begin. Learn to come at topics sideways to avoid provoking threat reactions.

Often the biggest problem is that you have made assumptions that the information you want is obvious – it isn’t. Even in a workplace, a person can have different interests and priorities than you do. You may consider the schedule the top priority, and they may consider the quality of the result the top priority. Learning to motivate someone who has different priorities than you do is a valuable skill.

READ MORE about Meetable Requirements and Engagement Skills from Patricia…

 

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Social Buzz Club Premier Training Topics Survey

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Social Buzz U is Social Buzz Club’s weekly webcast where experts offer high content training on the latest tools, online marketing and business practices.

We have delivered over 125 webinars to date. We are very proud of the content, speakers and our community. Yet, we refuse to sit on our laurels. We want to get better and need your input.

Our very first Social Buzz U webinar was on August 18, 2011 with Denise Wakeman, the initial weeks were followed by training from Amy Porterfield, Jeff Herring, and Mari Smith. Since that time we have delivered high content virtual trainings from over 125 presenters. This is one of the most valuable bonuses of being a paid member of the Social Buzz Club. Whether you’re a start up entrepreneur or highly sought after thought leader, we know you will gain wisdom from these leaders

We need your HELP to Make Social Buzz U Better

As we near our 3rd Anniversary we are inviting our community to speak up and let us know what is most valuable to you. We want to know what kinds of virtual training events you would drop everything for to attend. Or that you would want to watch the replays for sure!

Please take our 1 question survey and let us know what you want to learn.

How to be a speaker for Social Buzz U

We frequently get asked, “how do I become a speaker on Social Buzz U?”.

We have a few requirements:

  • that you have a cleaned up list size of 5,000 or more who are entrepreneurs, authors, thought leaders, bloggers or social media managers.
  • You have experience presenting webinars with PowerPoint or Keynote slides.
  • Your webinars deliver high value and get rave reviews.
  • You also must email your list to invite them to register for your webinar. Then share about it on Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn.
  • We highly recommend you join Social Buzz Club. It is preferred that you become a Premium Member.

Oh, and it only works if you love Social Buzz Club as well.

If you meet the above, then send us a request via http://socialbuzzclub.com/help -

Place in the subject: Speaker Inquiry from Your Name

In the description include:

  • Your topic. And a 2 sentence description of what you teach. Hint: Make it compelling so we get excited about you.
  • Email List size.
  • What you love about Social Buzz Club.

Please include your phone number and Links to your main social media accounts

We look forward to continuing to bring world class experts and training to you weekly.

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Motivate Like The Best! How The Best Leaders & Salespeople Do It.

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7692135Right now, I bet you know THAT person.

Who is THAT person you might ask? For many of us, it is hard to describe, so let me tell you the story of two people…

“Jane is the CEO of XYZ company. There is no question she is intelligent and hardworking. But what is amazing is everyone in the company believes in her vision. Yesterday, she gave a speech to a team of 100 employees. At the end, you could feel the energy and excitement throughout the group. Everyone left that meeting running back to his or her station to start working on the vision. I really don’t know what it is about her, but she just has that gift as a leader, to rally everybody to work harder than they would if she wasn’t there.”

Do you know this leader? Or how about this individual…

“Mark has recently joined the sales staff. But you wouldn’t know it by his rapid success! He only started with our company 4 months ago, yet, already seems to have more accounts than the rest of the team combined! What’s even more impressive is how little effort it seems to take for him to close a new account. One day, he meets a new prospect…the next, a new client! For everyone else, it seems it takes months to years to close the type of accounts he has! Yes, he is charming and seems to have that “it” quality, but so do a lot of other people.”

Do you know this salesperson?

Often, this person is described as “charismatic”, having that “it” quality, or if we are really jealous, we call them “lucky”. The sad part is when these terms are used; we the belief is that we have no control over this special talent.

Learn about “The Power Generator” live, with Alex Kuhn, on Thursday June 19, 2014 at Social Buzz U. It’s FREE to attend live, sign up now!

But what if you could learn this skill and apply it to your leadership and sales ability? I would like to introduce you to what I refer to with my clients as The Power Generator. To be your best as a leader and/or in sales, you must be able to create the necessary desire, passion, and attraction to generate emotion in another so that he or she will move in a specific direction. You may laugh, but I tell clients and others, like a superpower, you can use this skill for good or evil. Once mastered, you will not only be able to become better as a leader and in sales, but you will have the key to unlock the transformation you desire in yourself.

The Power Generator is mastering and combining three distinct sections:

The Story: Each individual that you come in contact with on a daily basis has his or her own story. This story is perceived both as the best and worst parts about themselves. Your ability to understand on a deep level the other person’s story is crucial to building an intimate connection.

The Emotion: Every person has two distinct emotions: Pain and Gain. Pain is the emotion and feeling of missing something. Gain is the emotion of wanting more of something. Being able to tap into the individual’s emotions will allow you to pull the necessary desire to change a person’s point of view.

The Importance: No matter who, there must be a compelling reason for taking action. No matter the action, it is necessary that it be connected to growing and improving one’s situation. By connecting an action to the individual’s importance, he or she will want to commence the process of change immediately!

To motivate like the best, you have to understand the person’s story, pull the necessary emotion, and clearly understand the importance of the change. With practice and time, you will be able to motivate like the best leaders and salespeople you know!

Posted in Business & Personal Skills, Systems, Working Smarter | Leave a comment

 

5 Blogging Tips to Help You Connect with Your Ideal Client

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Business blogEntrepreneur and best-selling author, Dave Kerpen once wrote that “Writing a blog is an excellent way to become a better writer, drive leads for a business and express oneself.” I couldn’t agree more. I’m positive that since I started my own blog 5 years ago, I’ve become a better writer. And I have gotten new clients from my blog because they told me that the information I shared was valuable to them.

If you haven’t started a blog yet, or you’re not consistently blogging, here are a few tips to make the process easier.

Write from the Heart – Many small business owners don’t blog because they feel they’re not good writers. Yet these same people will go to a networking meeting and happily talk about their products or services when asked. Write as if you’re talking with a good friend. Don’t obsess over grammar or spelling. If you have time, proofread your work. But if you don’t, publish the article anyway. You can always go back later and tweak it to your heart’s content.

The Power of One – Focus on one topic per blog article. If you have too many ideas in your post, it will just confuse the reader. And it will take you that much longer to get the article written. If you have a lot to say on a certain subject, you can always break the article up into a series. This is a great way to get your readers coming back to your blog again. Bonus tip: Include a link to the previous article and next article in the series.

They Ask, You Answer – Not sure what to write about? Answer your customers’ questions! Focus your articles on these three criteria: costs, problems and comparisons. People want to know how much your products or services cost, so why not tell them? You don’t have to be specific necessarily, but you can at least give a range. Don’t be afraid to address any problems with your product or service either. The more honest you are, the more inclined people will be to trust you. Another great tactic is to compare your product/service with a competitor. Your customer is doing this research online anyway. Wouldn’t it be better if they read your article first?

Variety is the Spice of Life – Liven up your blog with pictures and/or videos. Images are more visually interesting for the reader and will keep them engrossed in your copy. Plus, if you include a Pin it button for Pinterest, it will encourage your reader to share your content on their Pinterest account.

Know Your Call to Action – If you’re writing a blog to promote your business, don’t forget to include a call to action at the end of each article. Here are a few suggestions:

  • Visit our website for more information
  • Email us for a quote
  • What do you think? Share your comments below
  • Sign up for our newsletter
  • Register for our webinar
Get more useful blogging tips like these during my Social Buzz Club webinar called Blog Like a Winner on Thursday, May 22.
Posted in Blogging, Search Engine Optimization, Working Smarter | Leave a comment